Assertive communication styles: Learn about your communication style as a manager

Assertive communication styles are based on the individual’s self-awareness, motivation, and preference. These communication styles help people to communicate with clarity and confidence. When people use assertive communication styles, they feel more confident in their message delivery and know that they have been heard. In this blog, we will explore 5 different assertive communication styles and help you identify which one best fits your personality and communication style. We will also discuss the importance of assertive communication, its benefits, and the characteristics of an assertive communication styles. As a manager, understanding assertive communication can help you build stronger relationships, improve your communication skills, and lead your team to success. So, read on and learn more about assertive communication!

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Assertive communication styles: Learn about your communication style as a manager
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What is assertive communication?

Assertive communication involves expressing one’s thoughts, feelings, opinions, and needs in a clear, confident, and respectful manner. Assertive communication aims to establish mutual respect and understanding in a situation while avoiding aggression or passive behavior.

Some key characteristics of assertive communication include:

Clarity: Expressing one’s thoughts, feelings, and opinions clearly and concisely.
Confidence: Speaking in a manner that conveys confidence in one’s thoughts, feelings, and opinions.
Responsibility: Taking responsibility for one’s actions, thoughts, and feelings and avoiding blaming others.
Respect: Showing respect for other’s opinions and feelings while still being assertive in expressing oneself.
Honesty: Being truthful and transparent in communication while avoiding deception or manipulation.

Assertive communication can effectively resolve conflicts, build strong relationships, and improve self-esteem and confidence. However, it is essential to note that assertiveness should not be confused with aggression or passiveness and requires a delicate balance between expressing oneself and respecting the opinions and feelings of others.

Importance of assertive communication

Assertive communication is important because it:

Promotes self-esteem and respect: It allows individuals to express their thoughts and feelings confidently and directly, resulting in increased self-esteem and respect from others.
Improves relationships: By clearly expressing one’s boundaries and expectations, assertive communication can lead to better relationships with others and reduce conflict.
Increases efficiency: Assertive communication can help people get their point across clearly and directly, leading to the quicker and more efficient resolution of issues.
Enhances decision-making: It allows individuals to express their opinions and considerations effectively, leading to more informed decision-making.
Encourages personal responsibility: By communicating assertively, individuals take ownership of their thoughts and actions, leading to greater personal responsibility and accountability.

Types of assertive communication styles

There are several types of assertive communication styles, including:

Direct Assertiveness

This is the most straightforward type of assertiveness, where individuals express their thoughts and feelings directly and without hesitation. For example, “I feel uncomfortable with that situation, and I would like to discuss alternative options.” This direct communication style is effective when used clearly, concisely, and forcefully. However, it can be challenging to use direct assertiveness if you are not comfortable speaking in a confrontational way. These are a few signs of a direct assertive communication style:

Confident body language
Clear and direct language
Maintains eye contact
Respects the personal boundaries of others

Indirect Assertiveness

This type of assertiveness involves expressing one’s thoughts and feelings in a more indirect and non-confrontational way. For example, “I was wondering if we could consider a different approach. Can we talk about it?” This type of communication is effective when you need to communicate with someone difficult to reach or don’t want to get into an argument. Instead of directly confronting the other person, it can be more productive to talk about your concerns indirectly and express yourself in a way that doesn’t come across as aggressive. These are a few signs of an indirect assertive communication style:

The soft or neutral tone of voice
Asks questions rather than make demands
Uses “I” statements instead of blaming others
Avoids confrontational language

Aggressive Assertiveness

This type of assertiveness involves expressing one’s thoughts and feelings in a forceful or confrontational manner, often at the expense of others. For example, “That’s a stupid idea. We’re doing it my way.” Assertive communication is beneficial because it encourages people to be themselves and share their unique perspectives and experiences. However, assertive communication can become harmful when people use aggressive, assertive communication styles without thinking about the consequences of their behavior. These are a few signs of an aggressive assertive communication style:

Intimidating body language
The loud and forceful tone of voice
Uses blaming or accusatory language
Interrupts or talks over others

Check out Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness: How to be an effective leader? It’s important to note that assertive communication is different from aggressive communication. While assertiveness involves expressing oneself confidently and directly, aggression often involves overpowering or demeaning others.

Passive Assertiveness

This type involves avoiding confrontation and suppressing one’s thoughts and feelings. For example, “It’s fine, I’ll do it.” This passive behavior can harm relationships, as it often leads to feelings of powerlessness and frustration. Instead of taking action, passive, assertive individuals tend to take on the role of a listener rather than a leader. These are a few signs of a passive, assertive communication style:

Avoiding eye contact
Soft or mumbled speech
Uses vague or non-committal language
It avoids confrontation or difficult conversations

Assertiveness Responsiveness

Assertive Responsiveness is a type of assertive communication involving actively listening to others and being responsive to their needs while maintaining your boundaries and expectations. For ex: “I appreciate the request to work on the project, but I had already made plans for this evening. Can we discuss alternative options or schedule it for another day?” Assertive Responsiveness can lead to better communication, improved relationships, and more effective decision-making. It allows individuals to effectively express their thoughts and feelings while also considering the needs and perspectives of others. These are a few signs of an assertive responsiveness communication style:

Maintains eye contact
Nods and shows understanding through non-verbal cues
Uses confident and direct language
Expresses own thoughts and feelings clearly
Considers the needs and perspectives of others while expressing own thoughts and feelings

7 Characteristics of assertive communication styles

Confidence: Assertive individuals communicate confidently and self-assuredly without being aggressive or dismissive of others.
Directness: Assertive communication is direct and to the point, avoiding vague or indirect language.
Respect for Others: Assertive individuals respect the opinions and feelings of others while still expressing their thoughts and feelings clearly and directly.
Clear Boundaries: Assertive individuals set clear boundaries and communicate their needs and expectations effectively.
Active Listening: Assertive individuals listen actively to others, showing empathy and understanding for their perspectives.
Responsibility: Assertive individuals take responsibility for their thoughts, feelings, and actions without blaming others.
Openness: Assertive individuals are open and transparent in their communication, avoiding defensive or evasive language.

By exhibiting these characteristics, individuals can communicate effectively and build positive relationships with others. Assertiveness promotes mutual respect and understanding and can lead to more effective decision-making and conflict resolution.

Benefits of assertive communication styles

Increased confidence: Assertiveness builds confidence, allowing individuals to communicate their thoughts and feelings effectively.
Effective conflict resolution: Assertive communication can lead to more effective conflict resolution by promoting open and honest dialogue and finding mutually agreeable solutions.
Reduced stress: Assertiveness helps to reduce stress by allowing individuals to effectively communicate their needs and boundaries, reducing frustration and misunderstandings.
Improved productivity: Assertiveness promotes open and transparent communication, increasing efficiency and productivity.
Enhanced professionalism: Assertiveness reflects a professional demeanor, helping to build trust and respect in the workplace.
Increased job satisfaction: Assertiveness can lead to greater job satisfaction by allowing individuals to effectively communicate their needs and goals, reducing frustration and burnout.

You can learn about your assertive communication styles by taking a free assessment on Assertive Communication. Do you also want to step up your game as a manager? You can step ahead in your professional journey by signing up at Risely! Risely provides daily tips and suggestions based on your personal needs and helps you grow as a professional.

Conclusion

In conclusion, Assertive communication is a powerful communication style that can help you communicate clearly and assertively, build relationships, and be a successful leader. By using assertive communication skills, you can better manage the interactions between others and yourself. Understanding your assertive communication style, benefits, and characteristics can help you build stronger relationships, resolve conflicts, and lead your team more effectively. You can become a more effective communicator and leader by practicing active listening, setting clear boundaries, and taking responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Wondering how assertiveness differs from aggression?

Learn more about the art of assertive communication with Risely’s free assertive communication toolkit for managers

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Assertive Communication Skill: The 3 Cs Of Assertiveness For Managers

Assertiveness is an essential part of communication skills for managers. They enable you to express your needs and opinions assertively without becoming aggressive or passive-aggressive. Good communication skills can help improve your assertiveness and overall self-esteem, enabling you to voice your opinions and needs without fear of disapproval or rejection. And, of course, as with any skill, the more you practice them, the better you get at using them. This blog discusses assertive communication skills essential for managers to support their employees and colleagues in building a supportive work environment. We will also help you identify areas where you can work to make your communication more assertive in the workplace. So let’s get started.

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Assertive Communication Skill: The 3 Cs Of Assertiveness For Managers
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What are assertive communication skills?

Assertive communication is a secure and direct way of expressing thoughts, feelings, and needs in a way that is respectful to oneself and others. It involves straightforwardly expressing oneself without being aggressive or passive. Assertive communication skills are valuable for managers in many ways:

Conflict resolution: By expressing themselves clearly and directly, managers can resolve conflicts in a more productive manner. They can assert their point of view without being confrontational and help diffuse tense situations.
Improved relationships: Assertiveness can help managers build better relationships with their employees, as it demonstrates respect and consideration for others while setting clear boundaries. It increases trust and respect in the workplace.
Increased influence: Assertiveness can help managers to improve their power and authority, as it demonstrates confidence, decisiveness, and a clear understanding of what is expected.
Better decision-making: Assertiveness can help managers make better decisions by ensuring that all relevant information is taken into account and providing a clear and direct way to communicate their opinions and decisions.
Time management: Assertiveness can help managers to manage their time more effectively, as it allows them to communicate their priorities, set realistic deadlines, and delegate tasks effectively.
Improved performance: By using assertive communication, managers can provide clear expectations and feedback to employees, leading to improved performance and increased productivity.

Developing assertive communication skills requires practice and self-awareness, but with time, managers can develop this critical communication skill and improve their effectiveness as leaders. It is important to note that assertiveness is not the same as being aggressive, as it involves expressing oneself in a direct and honest manner while also considering the needs and feelings of others.

Check out “Assertive vs. aggressive: Know the difference!“

What are the three Cs of assertive communication skills?

The three Cs of assertive communication skills are control, clarity, and confidence.

Control

Control refers to maintaining control over a situation and one’s emotions. In assertive communication skills, this means staying calm, level-headed, and in control of the conversation, even in difficult or emotional situations. It allows one to communicate effectively and resolve conflicts in a constructive manner.

How to develop control in communication?

Practice active listening: Pay close attention to what the other person is saying and resist the urge to interrupt or jump to conclusions. It helps to maintain control of the conversation and avoid misunderstandings.
Stay calm: In difficult or emotional situations, take a deep breath, count to 10, or take a moment to collect your thoughts. It helps to maintain control of your emotions and allows you to respond in a clear and composed manner.
Avoid getting trapped in biases: Your biases can often lead you away from the conversation. Instead, you assume the other party’s intent and message. It can cause significant misunderstandings in teams.
Stay focused: Stay focused on the task and resist the urge to get sidetracked or distracted. It maintains control of the conversation and ensures that it remains productive.
Use body language: Nonverbal communication, such as eye contact, gestures, and posture, can help to communicate confidence and control. Practice good posture and use confident, open body language to project control.
Seek feedback: Seek feedback from others on your communication style, including handling difficult or emotional situations. With this, you identify areas for improvement and develop your control in communication.

Check out the 15 most important words in a manager’s vocabulary

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Clarity

Clarity refers to the ability to express oneself clearly and directly. In assertive communication skills, this means stating one’s thoughts, feelings, and needs in a straightforward manner, without ambiguity or passive-aggressiveness. Clarity helps to ensure that one’s message is understood and that the conversation remains productive.

How to develop clarity in communication?

Be specific: Be clear and precise in your communication, using concrete examples and avoiding generalities. It ensures that your message is understood and that there is no room for misinterpretation.
Use “I” statements: Use “I” statements to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs instead of blaming or accusing others. For example, instead of saying, “you never listen to me,” try saying, “I feel unheard when I try to share my thoughts with you.” It will help team members understand your perspective.
Avoid filler words: Minimize the use of filler words such as “um” or “ah,” as they can detract from the clarity of your message and undermine your credibility.
Avoid multitasking: Give your full attention to the conversation and avoid distractions such as checking your phone or email. This helps to maintain clarity and ensures that the conversation remains productive.
Use visual aids: Consider using visual aids such as diagrams, charts, or graphs to help illustrate your message. Presentations make complex ideas or concepts more clear and more understandable.

Confidence

Confidence refers to the belief in oneself and the ability to communicate effectively. Among assertive communication skills, this means standing up for oneself, speaking one’s truth, and being comfortable expressing opinions and needs. Confidence helps to establish credibility and influence and fosters respect and trust in relationships.

How to develop confidence in communication?

Know your subject matter: Prepare thoroughly for any conversation or presentation or research the topic, and familiarize yourself with the key points. It builds confidence and ensures that you communicate effectively.
Practice: Rehearse your message or presentation, practicing your delivery and body language. It enhances confidence and reduces the likelihood of nerves or hesitation during the actual conversation or presentation.
Stay positive: Maintain a positive, confident attitude, and avoid negative self-talk. This projects confidence and reduces the impact of any stress or anxiety.
Practice assertiveness: Be assertive in your communication, expressing your thoughts and ideas clearly and confidently. Avoid passive or aggressive communication styles, and strive for a balanced, proactive approach.
Use confident body language: Use sure, open body language, smile, make eye contact, smile, and maintain good posture. It shows confidence and enhances the impact of your message.
Invite feedback: Seek feedback from others on your communication style, including handling difficult or emotional situations. It can help you identify areas for improvement and develop your confidence in communication.

Combining control, clarity, and confidence allows one to communicate assertively and effectively in various situations. Whether resolving conflicts, giving feedback, or negotiating, assertiveness can help one to get their point across, build stronger relationships, and achieve desired outcomes. It is important to note that assertiveness is not the same as being aggressive or overbearing, as it involves respecting the needs and feelings of others while also expressing oneself clearly and confidently. Assertive communication skills require practice and self-awareness, but with time and effort, one can develop these skills and improve communication in all areas of life. Learn more about developing assertive communication skills at work with our detailed guide on assertive communication training for managers.

Is your communication assertive?

Assertiveness communication skills are the hallmark of an effective leader. When you are assertive, you communicate powerfully. In terms of communication, it is among the best styles that a manager can adopt to sail through many challenging situations that call for single-minded focus. Test your assertive communication skills for free with Risely now! The free assertive communication skill self-assessment for managers by Risely helps you identify exactly what you need to do take your assertive communication skills to the top level. With the help of a thorough analysis, Risely helps you discover a unique learning journey designed to help you overtake the people management challenges that hold back your team. Get started for free today without further ado!

Conclusion

Knowing how to assert yourself effectively is a skill that can make you a more competent communicator. Assertive communication skill doesn’t just help you be a better communicator but allows others to view you as more intelligent and respected. Unfortunately, communicating assertively doesn’t come naturally to everyone. You need to learn the basics of assertiveness through practice. If you want to learn more about assertiveness, check out our blog here.

Grab a free copy of the assertive communication toolkit for managers!

The assertive communication toolkit for managers outlines frameworks and gives samples to make your learning super easy. Check it out now

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